Chapter 5
Tim buttoned up the blue dress shirt that made his eyes pop, smoothing the front of it with his fingers. In the bathroom mirror, he saw Abbott and Costello crouched near the open door. The cats were staring at him. “This isn’t a date,” Tim said. “And I’m NOT trying to look my best. Really.”
The two felines both gave him identical skeptical looks, which made him sigh. “Okay, okay,” he muttered as he dabbed on a little cologne at his neck. “Adrian is super hot. And I’ve had a total crush on his twin brother for ages. But that doesn’t mean that I’m going to throw myself on him like a raving lunatic who hasn’t had sex in three months. Right,” he added in as firm a voice as he could manage. “Control is good. Control works.”
He turned around, seeing his pets still staring up at him. “I’ll be back in a few hours, guys,” he told them. “ALONE. I promise.”
Abbott and Costello merely blinked at him. Tim took a deep breath and left the bathroom. He had to meet Adrian at Modreno’s. For their non-date. Just to hang out. Two guys, keeping each other company, nothing more or less. Right. Good. Uh huh. Control…
Tim tried to concentrate on his menu, and NOT his dinner companion. It wasn’t easy. Adrian Freemont was such a hunk! It wasn’t helping any that he was casually but nicely dressed in a brown suede jacket that REALLY brought out the color of his green eyes, over a white shirt with the first two buttons unbuttoned. He swallowed as he imagined himself following that line of buttons, opening each one in succession to reveal more of the tanned skin underneath…
Cripes! He pulled himself together yet again, for like the fortieth time so far. While he’d had fantasies about Dr. Robert Freemont - lots of them - he’d always known in the back of his head that none of them would ever come true. Being with a sexy carbon copy of the good doctor, a copy that was both gay and unattached…it was extremely hard on him. Especially since he was the one who’d specified that this wasn’t a date, and that they wouldn’t be having sex afterward. He didn’t think that he’d ever regretted anything he’d ever said as much as he did telling Adrian that. What an idiot he was!
He tried to remind himself sternly of just why he’d said that in the first place. Adrian was obviously an egotistical player. He’d expected Tim to fall at his feet when he’d asked him out and worship at his altar. Well, he didn’t do that. And he wasn’t interested in a one-night stand, no matter how gorgeous the guy in question happened to be. Besides, if he did sleep with Adrian just once, every time he went into the clinic and had to look at the man’s identical twin he’d be tormented by memories. He’d probably have to find a new vet, and he didn’t want to do that. Abbott and Costello both liked Dr. Freemont, and Tim liked him too. Above and beyond his crush, that was. So he’d control himself and try to enjoy the evening for what it was, because he wasn’t going to throw himself on Adrian Freemont and beg him to have sex with him.
“It smells good in here,” Adrian commented, sniffing appreciatively.
“Yeah, the food’s great. I’d eat here more than once a month, but they’re also on the expensive side. My budget won’t stretch to more than a single monthly indulgence,” Tim said as he lowered his menu.
“What do you do?” Adrian asked him curiously.
“I’m an office manager at a major insurance company,” Tim replied. “It’s a living, but I’m not rolling in dough.”
Adrian eyed him. “If that’s so, how can you afford to bring your pets in all the time? Robert’s fees aren’t cheap.”
Tim laughed dryly. “Didn’t I say I worked for an insurance company? It’s simple. I got pet insurance. It’s just like my health insurance plan. I pay a monthly premium and deductibles for certain things like Cos’s surgery. Since I take them in to the clinic a lot, the insurance is way cheaper than if I paid on the spot for every visit and shot. And it means that my babies get all the care they need.”
“And then some,” Adrian remarked dryly. He eyed Tim. “You’ve got the hots for my brother, don’t you?” he asked bluntly.
Tim felt his cheeks heat a little. “I’ll admit that I have a little bit of a crush on him, yes,” he admitted with as much dignity as he could muster. “But I new he was straight and married from the get-go. There’s nothing wrong with a few fantasies about an unobtainable person, is there?”
Adrian snorted faintly as he opened his own menu. “No, not if it’s not interfering with your personal life,” he drawled.
“What’s that supposed to mean?!” Tim asked, stung.
Adrian lowered the menu enough to give him a direct stare over the top of it. “When’s the last time you were out on a real date, not just a ‘not-date’ like this?” he asked.
Tim turned red and huffed a bit. Then he sighed, his shoulders slumping. “Over three months,” he admitted. “But that doesn’t have anything to do with your brother! I was in a relationship for over a year before that, and it didn’t work out. I guess I haven’t felt like dating much since we broke up.”
“Uh huh,” Adrian said. “And you haven’t been using your crush on my brother as a substitute for actually getting out and trying to find someone else?”
Tim stared at him in shock. Had he…? Oh, man, had he really…? Sure, he’d been taking his cats to the clinic more often lately, but that didn’t mean… “Oh, geez,” he muttered. “I can’t believe this.”
Adrian gave him a sympathetic look. “Hey, don’t let it get you down. Look at me - I’m thirty-five years old, and I’m still chasing tail like a twenty-year-old frat boy. Robert pointed out to me the other day that my life is pathetic, and he may be right. After all, look how happy he is with Pam and the kids. What the hell do I have? My job and an empty apartment to go home to at night. That’s it. So don’t worry about being a loser, because I am WAY more of a loser than you.”
“I don’t think that you’re a loser,” Tim protested. “Maybe you’re still sleeping around because you haven’t found the right person yet. Your brother got lucky, that’s all. It’s not easy finding someone you want to spend the rest of your life with. Take it from me,” he added glumly.
“You said that you were in a relationship for a year,” Adrian said thoughtfully. “I take it it wasn’t a great relationship?”
“No,” Tim sighed. “In fact, I have no idea why I kept dating him. He was selfish and self-centered, and he never had any time for me. He’d cancel dates all the time, show up at my apartment without calling and expect me to just be there, and he totally took me for granted. I regret wasting a year of my life on him. It’s just…when you invest so much time and energy into someone, you don’t want to admit that it’s a bust because it just seems like such a waste. And starting over again from scratch can be pretty hard. I guess that’s why I’ve been living like a monk and taking my cats to the clinic a lot. I was depressed even thinking about trying to meet somebody else.”
“Sounds great. Now I remember why I avoid actually dating anyone,” Adrian drawled.
“But if you never do, you’ll never have a chance to meet the right person,” Tim told him. “And you’ll go on being a ’loser’. Is that what you really want?”
Adrian eyed him. “You have a way with words,” he said with a grimace.
Tim smiled wryly. “Sorry. But the truth is, even though I’ve been in hibernation these last few months I WILL eventually go out and try again. Because I want to meet that special somebody. I want what your brother has. Don’t you?”
Adrian fingered the edge of his menu. “Maybe,” he conceded. “I’m just not sure that I’m up to this whole dating thing. I’ve never done it before, so I have no idea how to go about it.”
Tim studied his handsome face. “Well, you’ve got some things going for you,” he remarked. “You’re good-looking, you have a great job, and you have to be pretty intelligent to be a veterinarian. Guys will flock to you.”
“They always do,” Adrian said with a shrug, “But most of them only want one thing from me. How do I go about meeting guys who actually want to have a relationship with me, rather than just wanting to jump my bones and never call me again?”
Tim ignored the egotism in the first part of that statement in favor of the second part. “I see your dilemma,” he said. “Well, how about this? I need to get back out on the dating scene, and you need to learn about it, so why don’t we go together? I can show you the ropes, and take you to places where you have a hope of meeting guys who are more interested in relationships than they are in no-strings-attached sex. What do you think?”
“I like it,” Adrian said. “But are you sure you want to do that? Have me in tow, I mean? I don’t want to get in the way.”
“It’s all right. It’ll be nice to have a wing man,” Tim said with a crooked smile. “The dating scene can be kind of lonely, sometimes. Having a friend around might help. I’ve never had a protégé before,” he added in amusement. “It might be fun.”
The waiter came and took their orders just then. Tim ordered the fettuccine carbonara, and Adrian ordered the eggplant parmesan. After he’d taken their menus and departed, Tim sipped at his glass of red wine. “We could go out together Tuesday night, if that’s all right with you,” he said. “I know this place that’s on the gay singles scene that’s good to meet guys looking for Mr. Right, not Mr. Right Now.”
“Yeah, I can do that,” Adrian said. “Barring any emergencies at the clinic. Listen, thanks for doing this for me, Tim.”
His smile made Tim feel rather dizzy. “Hey,” he croaked through a mouth gone suddenly very dry. “What are friends for?”
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